My childhood memories are filled with stories of my ‘mothers.’
Every weekday around 4:00 p.m., we drove to Mummy Taiwo’s, my mother’s twin, office and waited for her to leave work. As my brother and I walked into her gigantic office building, ICON, we were welcomed with tender smiles. We took a lift to her office, and her hallway was filled with colleagues who seemed excited to dote on us. They gave us sweets and asked us the same (always the same) questions about school. And I always had the same answers, ‘fine, ma/sir.’
Mum Tee had a medium-sized office with a table and chairs, which we moved around so we could hide under her desk. My brother and I would play games and sometimes talk while we waited for her. We tried to not be too loud because mum seemed ‘serious.’
Sometimes, I would stand up to look into her eyes and smile. She made me proud. She was always stylishly dressed. Her blood-red lipstick contrasted with her extremely light-skinned face and her curly black hair. Her suits had puffy shoulder pads and were loosely dangling around her body in a classy way. She seemed keen on solving a problem, making phone calls, and taking notes. I loved coming to see her here. She was different, she was not just ‘mum’ as we knew her, but a respected ‘boss.’
While my brother and I rotated between Mummy Taiwo and my mum’s office after school, it was ICON that I remember the most. Maybe it was the iconic high-rise building or just the warmth and pride I felt. But I dance around this memory a lot. It was here that I realized what I wanted to do with my life. It was my first introduction to the concept of work.
My other memories were in high school, in Doregos. Our assembly ground was also our visiting day hall. My mother, Mummy Kehinde, never missed a Visiting Day, Valentine’s Day, Open Day, or a Parents-Teachers Conference. She was always there to make sure I was doing okay in boarding school.
The memories that stick out are Valentine’s Days when she would bring me a cake, a surprise lunch, and a card. I think she silently understood that I struggled a lot after my dad’s passing and wanted to do everything to show I was loved. She always told me, “Your dad was a lover,” and I believe she wanted me to feel an extra abundance of love since I never really knew him. And she did—until today, she and Mummy Taiwo go out of their way to be there for me.
While our relationship can be complicated at times (sigh, parents can be annoying, abeg), I look at my mothers and remember their individual stories, wars, and fights, and know they did their best as a mother, father, government (we don’t have a government), teacher, and friend.
They created an environment where my cousins and I had so many fun memories. I have so many amazing memories of my cousins living with us, eating at the dinner table with us, watching movies and laughing, washing plates with my sister Bolaji, and singing. Having huge birthday parties and a green dress I didn’t want to take off!
I also listened to all my cousin’s teenage albums. My 2000s were filled with listening to Craig David’s album, Born to Do It; Justin Timberlake’s album, Justified (Justin and I cried a river together!); and Mariah Carey’s non-stop! I can sing all the songs (almost word-for-word) in Born To Do It! I’m having chills just writing this. When I meet Craig David, I must thank him for being a good friend (LMAO).
And my cousins’ boyfriends! I remember them well. I was wondering why my cousins liked light-skinned men! These men tried to bribe me with sweets and gifts, which I willingly took!
Since we are all in the Children’s Day spirit, I can’t help but reminisce about how amazing my childhood was. And I want to honour the parents who worked tirelessly to make our childhoods memorable. As you grow older, you will realize it takes an enormous amount of sacrifice!
I hope my children have profound memories of joy, friendship, cousins, and laughter!
Love,
Shally
